Mahshi is a dish of vegetables stuffed with ground beef, onion, tomato, herbs and rice, that are cooked in a broth with tomato and cumin sauce.
Mahshi, it is originally a traditional Greek dish which was made out of vine leaves stuffed with minced lamb meat and rice, according to the New York Times, but other resource that it is one of many dishes of Ottoman origin that spread throughout the territory of the ancient empire, from the Balkans to Egypt to the Levant.
The name mahshi can be translated as stuffed squash. In Croatian and Serbian, this dish takes the name of punjene tikvice. In Albania, it is called kungulleshka të mbushura. Finally in Turkey, it is called kabak dolmasi.
In Egypt, mahshi is present on all banquet tables for weddings, family reunions and especially during the celebrations of the month of Ramadan.
The base of this meal is preparing the stuffing made of rice, herbs (parsley, coriander and dill), semi cooked tomato sauce and a pinch boharat (Middle East mix spices) and salt and pepper. Once this filing is ready, you can use any vegetable of your choice. In Egypt we use cored zucchini, cored eggplants, cabbage leaves, grapevine leaves, or small bell peppers. You may also add some cooked ground beef to the rice mixture to make it a full meal.
This is a meal that takes a long time to prepare and making it is traditionally a communal activity, where all female members of the household sit and core and stuff while talking and bonding.Personally, the lady who sells me the vegetables, make the core for me so do not take me so long
Ingredients
3 cups short grain rice
3 large onions, chopped
2 large onion sliced or slides of zucchini
3 chopped tomatoes
A bunch of the following: parsley, coriander and dill
2 teaspoons of boharat
1 teaspoon of black pepper
3 teaspoons of sat
2 tbsp of ghee (samna baladi)
Chicken or meat Broth
Tomato sauce and cumin
– 10 pieces of zucchini- Choose pieces that are slightly fat and short
– 10 pieces of eggplant
– In other pot, 20 cabbage leaves (blanched and middle rib removed)
– and 20 vine leaves (blanched)
Elaboration:
Sauté chopped onions in 2 tbsp of ghee for 3 minutes or until wilted and yellow. Add the chopped tomato, salt, pepper and boharat. Simmer for 3 minutes.
Rinse the rice thoroughly and drain. Finely chop the herbs. Add the prepared mix of onion, spices and tomato and herbs to the rice and mix well.
Core the vegetables using what we call in Egypt “Mai-warr” or literally “corer”. Try to remove most of the core leaving only a thin outer shell, taking care not to break or pierce the vegetables.
If you are using eggplant, put each piece in a bowl of water as you core them one by one to avoid the eggplant darkening in color.
For leafy vegetables blanch and cool the leaves.
Using a teaspoon, stuff each vegetable with the rice mixture pushing down the rice as you add more with the handle of the spoon. Leave ½ cm unstuffed to allow the rice to expand when cooked.
Add a bit of ghee to the bottom of a non stick pot. Arrange the onion or zucchini slices to cover the bottom. This is to avoid the bottoms of the vegetables being charred if the water dries out and it also gives a nice flavor to the meal.
Arrange the stuffed vegetables on top of the onions in a slightly standing position to avoid the rice spilling out.
Add 2 cup broth and tomato sauce and a bit of cumin . Bring to a boil, then simmer on very low heat till rice is cooked, about 15-20 minutes. When it cools down slightly, arrange the vegetables in a serving dish and discard the onion slices.
For the leafy vegetables like cabbage, spread the leaf, add 1 tbsp rice mixture and roll like a wrap without tucking the ends. If using vine leaves you need to tuck the ends while you roll.
Served warm with a main dish of chicken or meat and yogurt salad.
I’m sure that we’d all wish to have the perfect family: every member of the family being kind and loving. Parents fulfilling the rights of their children and vice-versa, harmony between siblings, a marriage with very few conflicts and loads of happy moments, and delightfully obedient children. Indeed, I doubt that such a family exists on this planet, yet it cannot be denied that there are some families whose happiness radiates wherever they may be; they have strong connections of love and affection. May Allah swt preserve such families. The truth is, however, that most of us have conflict and strife within our families; with our parents, siblings, cousins, spouses, children, in-laws, etc. Some of this conflict is minor, while some of it has left stains of trauma and wreaked havoc in our lives. Where I find stability and contentment, however, is in the realization of three important things:
Every family has their issues.
Pure happiness and contentment with one another is reserved for Paradise, and not the life of this world.
Even within our own Islamic tradition, we find countless examples of great people who dealt with all sorts of familial issues.
What happens when we can not overcome or resolve those family issues? What do we do when the conflict is so severe, it seems that the relationship can not be repaired. When that hurt and or betrayal is just too overwhelming we can not seem to move past it. And, specifically during a time like the holy month of Ramadan. A time in which the focus should be about worshiping, giving, appreciation, gratefulness,blessings, many of which should include family. It is a time when we should be putting all of our personal feelings aside so that we can focus on strengthening our relationship with our Creator Allah swt. A time when we should be forgiving, while asking Him for forgiveness. A time to possibly mend those broken relationships.
How To Identify Toxic Family Members
When a family member’s words and actions have a negative impact on your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well being, that’s a telltale sign that you’re being traumatized by this person. Here are a few more signs:
You act differently around this individual. You are not your usual self and you are stressed out for days, even months after any encounter with this person.
Flashbacks of the unpleasant events are a part of your daily life. You hear their disapproving voices and disappointed faces in the back of your head.
You’re exhausted from pent up anger, helplessness, and the fear of not being the good Muslim who can forgive things easily.
You feel like you’re never good enough, not until you get their approval anyways.
Even in the case of our own Prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him), his biggest critics were his family. But a hadith indicates that once a man said to the Messenger of Allah pbuh,
“I have relatives with whom I try to keep in touch, but they cut me off. I treat them well, but they abuse me. I am patient and kind towards them, but they insult me.”
The Prophet pbuh said,
“If you are as you say, then it is as if you are putting hot dust in their mouths. Allah will continue to support you as long as you continue to do that.” (Reported by Muslim with commentary by al-Nawawi, 16/115).
Holding on to toxic family members is harmful for us. So how do we deal with them? We must take responsibility for our lives and take the necessary actions required to bring us peace. InshaAllah.
Give yourself permission to be happy
You might have been mistreated by a family member for a long time. You thought, I’m used to it, no big deal, I don’t cringe as much when I’m talked down to, nor do I cry so much when I’m humiliated. But, then you all of those emotions and feelings sneak up on you when you least expect it. You feel emotionally drained all of the time, you can’t keep focus and end up taking it all out on your kids or your spouse. Toxic relationships are stressful for you and your loved ones. By doing this you are holding in too much. You’re burdening your soul with something that’s hurting you.Give yourself permission to release all of this pain and be happy. There is no reason why the abuse shouldn’t stop today. You can control what kind of people you want in your life, adding kind, supportive people to your life and limiting time with or eliminating any negative people. You have the right to a happier life, a life that’s a blessing from Allah swt. There is no reason to keep on holding on to people who bring you down and make your life miserable. Allow yourself to live a better life. Start by doing the right things and taking full responsibility for your happiness and well being. By doing this, you’re not only taking actions to improve your life but also setting an example for others, especially your kids.
Embark on acceptance
Acceptance can be a bitter pill to swallow, as you’ll need to learn to accept the realities of your life. But, this acceptance will make your life so much calmer when you come to terms with the way that things are. For whatever reason, you’ve been making excuse after excuse for this person’s behavior. You kept hoping for the impossible. You tell yourself maybe if I do “this” just once more, things will improve with them. You turned the other cheek. You pretended it doesn’t matter because irrespective of how they’ve treated you, they really mean well for you. Maybe you have been dealing with this for so long that you believe the nastiness doesn’t get to you anymore. After all, they were supposed to be there for you, not to hurt you. Acceptance is a process. To begin this, understand that what was done to you is wrong. There’s no need to inflict yourself with too many painful details to begin your acceptance journey. There is no point in dwelling on these negative details that had happened in the past. It is hard to accept that your mom treats you differently than your brother. You’ll find yourself justifying her unfair behavior. After all she is the mom, she knows better. It’s difficult to make sense of why your in-laws prefer your brother in law over your husband, or her other grandkids over your kids. For whatever reason, you’ve been making excuse after excuse for this person’s behavior. You can’t reach a healthy level of acceptance if you keep on asking the wrong questions! Start working on acceptance, today, right now. You will sway between acceptance and denial, but start the process anyway. When you don’t accept what is going on, your life remains in limbo. But, when you accept the facts of your life, as unpleasant as they can be, you have something to work with to make your life better, InshaAllah.
“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results.“Sometimes we don’t have much control over some of the unfortunate events that occur in our lives. But most of the time, we can control the events in our lives. You can’t change the abuser but you certainly can change your relationship with them by defining what kind of relationship you’ll have and creating boundaries.. Drawing boundaries will help you establish a healthy relationship with your family members, toxic or not. These are the rules determined by you so you know what is acceptable to you and what is not. Sometimes we make these rules after getting burned too often or for too long. But, it’s never too late to set up boundaries to protect yourself.
Limit your exposure to toxic people
Toxic people and their negative behavior can traumatize you if you allow them to.This is not something you want to get used to, no matter how close a family member this person is. Do your best to protect yourself. Limit your encounter with toxic people. You’re more in control than you think you are. But, you must be consistent with it. The message gets lost when you’re not consistently there to protect yourself. You can limit your visits and reduce the length of conversation over the phone. Consider making shorter, less frequent visits and phone calls. You must treat yourself the way you expect others to treat you. Keep your distance from negative family members who don’t treat you kindly and respectfully. You can’t change others’ actions but you can choose how to respond to them. There is no reason to keep people around in your lives who repeatedly aggravate you with lies, criticizes you, gossips about you, exploits you, mocks you and brings you down with stress and other negative feelings. Don’t surround yourself with these kinds of people. Stay away from them until they change their behavior. Do it as long as it takes. You deserve respect and peace.
But, what about cutting ties?
“Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him maintain the bonds of kinship” (Bukhari)
This is a common ploy of abusive people, specifically family. They will bring quotes from the Quran and examples of Hadith and use these as a club to hit you even harder. They know that you’re afraid of sins and displeasing Allah swt so they find another way to abuse you more. This kind of behavior only exposes their double standard more explicitly. They will likely accuse you of:
not following Islam properly.
how you should be a better muslim.
how good muslims don’t cut ties and forgive people (i.e let them abuse your forever),
how you’re being so arrogant and ungrateful after they’d done so much for you.
how you’re going to go to hell fire because for being a bad muslim
What about forgiveness?
Like acceptance, forgiveness is a process. It’s not a switch that you can turn on right away after you’re traumatized. So, be patient and don’t be hard on yourself for not being able to forgive your toxic family member right away. If you can find forgiveness in your heart, alhamdulillah, good for you. But if you can’t, don’t put yourself down by thinking that you are a lesser muslim. Pray to Allah swt, so you can work on your pain and eventually you can start taking steps toward forgiveness InshaAllah. If you’re struggling with forgiveness, keep in mind that forgiving someone is NOT the same as condoning what they did to you. It’s choosing to respond wisely to an unfortunate event. Forgiving is taking back control of your life from anger and stress that stems from how they treated you. Remember, no one gets away with oppressing another person. Allah swt accepts the prayers of an oppressed person and will bring the abuser to justice. Find calm and solace in Allah’s justice and wait for it’s manifestation inshaAllah.
Protect yourself from yourself
You can do this by following these few steps
Distance yourself from them
Don’t continuously think about the things that they have said and done to you. Leave the past in the past
Dont stoop to their level. Remember you own values and morals and follow them.Stooping to their level won’t change them so don’t let anger and bitterness take over.
Try to not talk about them. In general backbiting is wrong as we all know, but the more that you talk about them, the more you’ll think about them.
Retaliation is not an option. Instead focus on how you can improve yourself.
Keep praying. Be patient. This will help you to become a stronger Muslim and you will be rewarded by Allah swt InshaAllah
As Ramadan approaches, it is important that we keep in mind that our soul purpose is to become closer to Allah swt. We must focus on Him and pray. Ask Him for guidance in such situations. It is possible to not have to cut ties with family, as this is a last resort, and still set boundaries in order to protect ourselves and hopefully heal and build healthy relationships. Trust Allah to guide us all. After all He knows best. May Allah swt keep us strong and bring us closer to him and our loved ones this Ramadan.Ameen InshaAllah.
Sister Rebecca is a SAHM living in Houston Texas. Married for 13 years with two children, and a revert since 2014, her hobbies include cooking, reading, and spending time with family.
Foul Medames is a very famous Egyptian dish made with fava beans as the main ingredient. Its origin come from the pharaonic times (Some remnants of foul medames was found in a tomb of the 12th Dynasty).
Egyptians used to eat this dish like breakfast together with ta3meya (falafel), pita bread and mixed salad . Also foul is the main dish for suhoor in Ramadan.
Egyptian streets during Ramadan nights are full of street vendors where they can buy foul that are already cooked only to season at home according of the preference of each one.
I share with you my recipe:
Ingredients:
Cooked Fava beans (you can cook in a slow cooker or in a medamesa 6 hours low fire o canned)
Tahina sauce (sesame paste)
Lemon juice
Salt, pepper and cumin
Olive oil
Elaboration:
Mix all the ingredients except the olive oil and blend its.
Served with a splash of olive oil, pita bread and mixed salad, For suhoor you can add also boiled eggs and cottage cheese
Fava beans are loaded with vitamins, minerals, fiber and protein. They’re thought to offer impressive health effects, such as improved motor function and immunity.
My husband has often told stories of the excitement and anticipation he felt as a child the closer that the holy month of Ramadan neared. Growing up in Egypt, he had the full experience of Ramadan and it’s beauty. With two children of our own, living in the states, they don’t have the beautiful experience that he did. So every year we try to create that ambiance here at home. So far our children love it all! However, although we want them to enjoy every bit of excitement around this special time, we want to make sure that they take away the true purpose of Ramadan. Of course they love the food, gifts, money, games, crafts, all of the fun stuff. But are we teaching them what really matters at the same time? As parents how can we be sure that our children have a full understanding of what Ramadan means? Aside from the fun, the food, and the overall joy that comes with this blessed month, what can we do to ensure that our children are in fact experiencing the true joy of Ramadan?
Traditional Ramadan Practices
During the ninth month of the Islamic calendar, which is based on the phases of the moon, Muslims around the world celebrate Ramadan, a holy month of spiritual reflection and fasting. It remembers the month that the Qur’an (the holy book for Muslims) was originally revealed to the Prophet Muhammad.
During the month of Ramadan, people of Islamic faith wake up before sunrise for a small meal and then do not eat again until the sun sets at night. While fasting may sound like an extreme practice to non-Muslims, this sacrificial blessing period is filled with self reflection, family celebrations, and late-night meals. If you’re celebrating the holiday with kids, it’s important to instill the traditional Muslim values while also bringing a little fun into the mix. The word “Ramadan” comes from the root word “ramdhaa,” whichmeans “intense heat of the sun,” referring to the environmental conditions of this calendar season. After 30 days of sacrifice, families hold a three-day celebration of fast-breaking called Eid al-Fitr. Muslim kids often receive gifts and indulge in treats during the festival.
Islamic law states that children who have not yet reached puberty aren’t required to observe fasting. Still, some families have their children participate in the fast anyway, or they find other ways to teach their kids about devotion, generosity, goodwill, and self-control. Whether or not your family decides to fast, participates in semi-fasts, or doesn’t fast at all, here are some ways for you to honor the holiday with kids.
Read Ramadan themed children’s books: there are many sites online where you can purchase books for children of all ages. This will make it easy for them to learn and understand the importance of Ramadan.
Decorate your home: Stars and crescent moons liven up Muslim families’ homes during this month long holiday. Engage your children by making your own paper versions for the three-day Eid al-Fitr celebration. Hang white twinkly LED lights in your kids’ rooms, so they feel like they’re a special part of the holiday. You can also build excitement for Eid-al-Fitrby displaying a countdown decoration in your home. Each day Ramadan progresses, your kids can cross off a number on the calendar.
Teach children Ramadan greetings: During Ramadan, faithful Muslims greet one other by saying “Ramadan Mubarak.” This greeting, which means “blessed Ramadan,” is just one traditional way that people welcome friends during this holy time. Giving your kids a variety of greetings at a young age allows them to take part in more adult-like discourse, while also teaching them values they will cherish for a lifetime.
Involve children in meal preparation: Cooking as a family creates the perfect backdrop for discussing all things Ramadan. Plus, it teaches your children how to prepare traditional dishes at the same time. Ask your kids to help make the meal each night during Ramadan, even if it means staying up past their bedtime. The memories they’ll form while cooking traditional Ramadan recipes will create an anticipated excitement knowing they had a hand in feeding the hungry family.
Instill Ramadan-inspired values of giving: Encourage your children to provide a service for others by saving money for the needy during the month of Ramadan. And make it a family affair! For instance, take the money you’d spend on a cup of coffee each day and plop it into a jar, showing your commitment to your children’s cause. We have Sadaqah boxes for each child here at home. Then, at the end of Ramadan, use the money to buy food to buy a meal for a needy family.
Enjoy a festive Eid Al-Fitr. Otherwise known as “Eid,” Eid Al-Fitr marks the end of Ramadan with a multi-day celebration that includes gathering to view the new moon, neighborhood fairs, visits to parks, and eating special sweet treats. Decorate both your home and your bodies by letting the kids paint traditional henna designs on their hands (or you can do it for them). Culminate the celebration with a picnic or backyard barbecue, complete with legal fireworks. Maybe even invite some non-Muslims to your party so your kids can take part in their traditional family celebration alongside friends (while also teaching them their customs).
However, you and your family choose to celebrate, be sure to make sure that while eating lots of food and having tons of fun, that your children walk away with a full understanding of the true meaning of this special time. Encourage them to embrace it fully so that they too can teach these customs and traditions to their own children. As parents we must lead by example as well, so be sure that you are doing all that you can to show and teach them so that they too may follow the right path.May Allah keep us strong and faithful throughout the holy month so that we can teach our children the true meaning of Ramadan InshAllah.
Sister Rebecca is a SAHM living in Houston Texas. Married for 13 years with two children, and a revert since 2014, her hobbies include cooking, reading, and spending time with family.
Today, we are going to talk about a very Egyptian Ramadan tradition, the FANOUS, from its origin to as we know it today.
Although the FANOUS – Arabic for lantern – are currently used as a decorative item or a toy for children to enjoy during the holy month, a journey back in time shows that their journey began quite differently.
Despite its common use in modern Arabic, the word fanous originates from the Greek word φανός – pronounced almost similarly – which means lantern, or a means of illumination, whether portable or fixed.
The first reviews on the origin of the FANOUS may differ, but all point to Cairo as the birthplace of the FANOUS as we know it today.
The story begins just over a thousand years ago, on the 5th of Ramadan of the Hijri (lunar) year 358 (969 AD), when the Cairots awaited the arrival of al-Mu’izz li-Din Allah al-Fatimy during darkness. . To ensure an illuminated entrance for the Caliph, Gawhar al-Siqilli, the military commander and viceroy at the time, ordered the city’s residents to light the way by holding candles along the way. To avoid extinguished candles, the townspeople placed their candles on wooden bases and closed them with palm and light skin. As the caliph walked through the city, he admired the design and from there the FANOUS became a symbol.
Another account tells that the families of Cairo used to accompany the Caliph throughout his journey through the city passing through the ancient gates of Cairo, Bab el-Nasr, Bab el-Fetouh and Bab el-Dahab on his way to the Mokattam hill for the sighting of the moon in Ramadan, announcing the beginning of the holy month. Along the route, children happily held the FANOUS and sang in welcome and celebration of Ramadan.
Although the early stories of the FANOUS may not be surprisingly strange, others associated with the FANOUS are quite unusual.
In the 10th century AD, the Caliph el-Hakim bi-Amr Allah forbade women from leaving their homes for the entire year. The only exception was during Ramadan when women were allowed to attend prayer outside their homes and visit relatives and neighbors. But that exception was made as a condition that women had to be accompanied by children who carried the FANOUS to illuminate their path and notify men that a woman is walking.
Furthermore, Caliph el-Hakim bi-Amr Allah approved an order for lanterns to be installed in every alley and in front of every shop and home. Whoever disobeyed was fined. Under such strict orders, the FANOUS industry in Cairo flourished remarkably
During Fatimid times, celebrations and holidays were of notable importance to the Egyptians, this is the reason why they invested a lot of time and effort in preparing for them. Consequently, the FANUS industry began to change from a utility for lighting houses, mosques and shops to a decorative item used during Ramadan.
In addition, it was spread as a tradition for children to walk along the roads and alleys with their FANOUS and singing happy songs while asking for gifts and sweets.
At night, the mesaharaty, a person whose job it is to wake people up for Suhoor before sunrise in Ramadan, would also gather the children around them as they happily chanted through the neighborhood, carrying the fanuos.
Over time, more traditions emerged that linked the FANOUS with Ramadan, resulting in a deeply rooted bond in Egyptian traditions.
Little by little, the Egyptian FANOUS began to reach neighboring countries until it became a Ramadan tradition in many of them, especially in Damascus, Aleppo, Jerusalem, Gaza and others.
Although the tradition is seasonal, the FANOUS industry is active throughout the year, even in our modern times. Throughout the year, industry innovators work to create and craft new designs. They are then stored until shortly before Ramadan, when they become available for sale.
As the original birthplace of the FANOUS, Cairo continues to maintain its pivotal role in the industry. The center of today’s FANOUS industry is considered to be Taht ElRab “, an area near al-Azhar. There, you can find some of the largest FANOUS workshops that have been passed down from one generation to another.
About the Author: Marisa Lopez Chicote is an event planner and mother of 5, living in Cairo and Muslim since 1985, alhamdullah. She loves travelling and cooking.
HOW TO BALANCE WORSHIP AND HOUSEHOLD CHORES IN RAMADAN
Author : Marisa Lopez Chicote
Ramadan is the month to purify our minds and hearts, ask for Allah’s forgiveness and to submit ourselves to the Almighty. However, women are expected to spend much of their time in the kitchen preparing and planning suhoor and iftar dishes for their families.
Even cooking and taking care of the family and children is equally rewarding as any act done with the pure intent to please Allah, the Most High, is rewarding:
Let us see 5 tips to be able to have more time for the real purpose of Ramadan, worship and seeking Allah’s mercy and forgiveness.
Make a schedule with realistic goals for each week. Some are daily goals like making an effort to be on time for each prayer, reading at least one juz of the Qur’an a day or participating in nightly Taraweeh prayers. Weekly goals may include limiting time-wasting activities such as time spent on the computer and watching television and weekly food schedules.
Involve your spouse and children in home chores. We are not superwomen and we can not be in everything (work, home and worship). Get your children and husband involved in cleaning up after themselves, setting the table and helping you around the house and kitchen within their capacity. Train them before Ramadan so you won’t have to hover over them and waste your time and energy making sure the work is done right. Let them know the amount of reward they get with the right intention is multiplied during Ramadan, and that it adds to their basket of good deeds by helping you. The Prophet, aleiho assalato wassalam was the best example
Eat healthy and simple. Ramadan is not a training to apply to the “MasterChef” program. Try to make simple and easy menus plan (check our weekly suggestion of menus plan in Ramadan) Eating healthy allows us to make the most of the month, and it means less time repairing elaborate dishes. Make sure you have some fruits for iftar and a light dinner, so that you can stay awake and energised for taraweeh.
Complete the reading of the Quran as least once during Ramadan. Supposed it takes you one hour to read a Juz, then you should separate 1 hour from the 4 hours of worship everyday JUST to read the Quran. Furthermore, you can divide the 1-hour of Quran reading time into 2 or more pieces of 30 minutes. The next step is for you to decide what time of the day is best for you to read the Quran. If you can separate 30 minutes after Fajr and 30 minutes after Maghrib everyday, then you will easily complete reading the entire Quran once in Ramadan.
Increasing your sadakka (charity) Charity is not only beneficial for those who receive it, there also lays a great reward for the ones who give. It is essentially food for the soul and serves as a means of salvation as well.
May Allah swt let us live to see this Ramadan and many more, and let us use our time wisely. I hope these tips help you to solve the stress with the household and give you a more productive Ramadan InshaAllah!
About the Author: Marisa Lopez Chicote is an event planner and mother of 5, living in Cairo and Muslim since 1985, alhamdullah. She loves travelling and cooking.